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MUSINGS, AMUSINGS & ABUSINGS
"Anyone Without a Sense of Humour
is at the Mercy of the Rest of Us!"
There are two kinds of people in the world, those that
think there are two kinds of people in the world,
and those that know better.
Iraqis On Star Trek
The Iraqi Ambassador to the UN was walking down the hallway and bumped into President Bush.
Hoping to break the ice with an innocuous comment, the ambassador quickly said, "Respectfully, sir. I have a question about what I’ve seen in America."
Politely, President Bush answered, "If I can help explain things to you, please let me know."
The Iraqi whispered. "My little girl watches this show called 'Star Trek' and in this show, there’s Chekov who is a Russian, Scotty who is Scottish, Sulu who is Chinese… but there aren't any Iraqis. Why aren’t there any Iraqis on Star Trek?".
President Bush whispered back to the ambassador, "It's because Star Trek takes place in the future."
What do you say to a one legged hitch-hiker?
Hop in.
AUSSIE SHOPPING
REDNECK FLAT SCREEN
GEICO AD
Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler. A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work. Money can't buy happiness. But it sure makes misery easier to live with. Money can't buy happiness. But it sure makes misery easier to live with. Few women admit their age; Fewer men act it. About a third of all Americans flush the toilet while they're still sitting on it. (Who studied this and why?) Keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them. 
